Wardrobe

Therapy encourages you to pull out your insecurities from the wardrobe of your mind. The fears hanging high, the ignored inner child folded between files of trauma, the maladaptive behaviours falling out at 4 a.m. when you try searching for your nightdress. 

The space is overstuffed but we won't rush for a picture-perfect moment. Healing is not about perfection anyway. We'll look at the shelves (one by one), understand what the locker has been concealing, plan what needs the laundry service and what we can rearrange. 

It could take months to dry clean the shirts of unpleasant feelings, you may not even want to touch it when you first look at it and it's okay. Whenever you are tired, we'll pause and take a mindful breath. Only after you replenish your energy, will we get back to the blue shirt you were attempting to iron.

You'll see yourself giving away some clothes that you no longer wear. Sometimes it may be particularly difficult to let go of a few coats and ties because you've had those for years. But you've outgrown old patterns and you have been able to push yourself to buy new outfits. There were doubts and questions that popped up. Yet, you did go to the trial room before making a decision. Some decisions are easily made while some take years. It's alright, it really is. We are not displaying our progress cards on a notice board for public scrutiny. 

The wardrobe is neater on some weeks than others. The graph is not linear, it is unlikely that it will be so. In therapy, we first learn to accept the wardrobe when it is unsettled. We are aware that neatness needs consistent maintenance and it is hard work. The challenges don't go away, we train ourselves to work in their presence.

And, while you are taking care of the wardrobe, you know that you're not alone. Your therapist is unconditionally rooting for you.

©songbriti